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Doing time in Oslo and more tourist attractions

Doing time in Oslo and more tourist attractions

Doing time in Oslo was fun. I mean, not behind bars, although actually, there were bars involved. Eh, you know what I mean.

Tomek and I did couple quality time in Oslo. Basically, an aimless walking tour, that may prove to be in some way beneficial to the public. This post is about randomly entertaining sights in Oslo, that You, dear reader, might feel inspired to visit.

I was very impressed with what’s going on in Oslo, watching the rise of a prospering capital from Oslo’s new opera hill. Norwegians are really making something out of their natural resources. You can feel construction sites vibrating as you walk through Oslo.

Oslo's new modern buildings across Opera


I am happy for the Norwegians. Because it wasn’t always like that. Look at Akershus fortress. How did high heeled queens and princesses cope on that castle terrain in 1299?

Akershus Fortress Oslo Akershus Fortress Oslo


Indisputable amazing view from the fortress but no elevator for fortress royalty.

Oslo fjord view from Akershus Fortress


Today, luxury has finally found its way into Norwegian lives. A modest residence, close to Oslo’s centre, near the must see Holmenkollen ski jump.

Norwegian house Holmenkollen Oslo


Norwegian life has changed for the better. The military pad out the sidewalk and roll out the lawn, in case pedestrians complain about uncomfortable flooring.

Norwegian military forces roll out lawn Oslo


Oslo’s harbour is occupied by toys of nouveau-riches.

boat for the rich Oslo Fjord


Electric cars are a frequent sight in Oslo. Because they are expensive.

electric cars Oslo


Norwegians have many kids. Because they are expensive, too.  Stage performance Oslo is designed to entertain little brats. If you have kids, Oslo is their your family-friendly city.

child entertainment Akershus Fortress Oslo




Norwegians splash out on decorative art, fun stuff and expensive gadgets. For that matter, we enjoyed Aker Brygge, a modern complex at Oslo’s port, located in the centre of down town Oslo.

The popular walking strip. We were passing shops, stopping at bars and restaurants, primarily to marvel at prices.

face sculpture Oslo port


That’s me with big Eyes. I am not kidding, that sculpture is named ‘Eyes’ by Louise Bourgeois.

Eyes sculpture by Louise Bourgeois Oslo Norway


Tomek, enhancing maritime sculpture arrangement.

Aker Brygge anker sculpture Oslo


Since 2002 there is an Eternal Peace Flame at Aker Brygge. And in 2008 it was joined by a statue of Sri Chinmoy, a spiritual teacher. We walked in peace. Om.

Eternal peace flame Oslo


Further down, you will find the monster head and a man in the water, on stilts.

Aker Brygge monster sculpture Oslo person on stilts sculpture Aker Brygge Oslo


Look up and you will see a laid back dude, who can afford to walk the walls of Oslo’s trendy harbour area. Ain’t Spiderman.

Man walking wall Aker Brygge sculpture Oslo


Property prices of Aker Brygge. 82 m2 flat for 6 900 000 NOK (= 930 000 Euros).  Norway is expensive for everyone, except for Norwegians. They pay for prime location apartments with their pocket money.  I think.

property prices Aker Brygge port area Oslo


More amusing sculptures. Left at Aker Brygge, right at City Hall square.

Polar bear and pointy spiral shell in the back. The water drips as he drinks, looking very real!
Aker Brygge sculptures Oslo drinking man sculpture Oslo


Oslo’ s manholes can be attractive, too.

Manhole Oslo


People are queueing for a photo with the bronze Tiger in front of Oslo Central Station. Oslo’s nickname is Tigerstaden (city of tigers).  Where, in fact, Oslo should be referred to as Kvinnerstaden (city of woman). Personally, I would queue for the female sculptures in Oslo. Why?

Tiger sculpture Oslo woman sculpture Oslo


Because Norwegians have a fetish, which are women sculptures with spread legs.

naked woman sculpture Oslo port naked woman sculpture Oslo port


Explain art to me, foxy lady.

spread leg woman sculpture Oslo


Real Norwegian women, in turn, have a penis fetish.

Woman with penis Oslo Woman with penis Oslo




There is always something going on down town. Walk towards Oslo’s harbour and you will see.  That weekend Oslo was warming up for the Bollywood Festival from the 7th to 14th September 2012. There will be stars, new and old movies, music and dance:

drummers Oslo


And lots of multi-culti stands. I came across a true idealist of our times. The Esperanto advocate. The idea, that we could all speak one language, is fascinating. And that the Muslim world, lead by the Muslima in the picture, would be a forerunner. Utopia is catching. I sort of felt sorry, that the current Esperanto is English.

Esperanto stand at Bollywood festival Oslo




When in Oslo, one shouldn’t ignore the Nobel Peace Center. The museum deals with some of the most important issues, mostly conflicts, in the world today and shows the work of smart and uncorrupted people, who try to solve them – the Peace Laureates. The museum is really modern inside. It is located at the City Hall Square, facing Oslo’s City Hall.

There is a tragic-funny story behind the initiation of the Nobel Prize. Alfred Nobel was a wealthy Swedish engineer, who made a fortune through his explosive invention – dynamite, largely not used for peaceful purposes. When his brother died, the press published Alfred’s obituary by mistake,  saying some nasty stuff post mortem, with headlines, like “the merchant of death is dead”. To be remembered with more enthusiasm, in his last will, Alfred Nobel decided to finance and initialise the Nobel Prize, to put his riches to good use. Essentially, this is the story of Iron Man.

Nobel Peace Center Oslo


The Oslo City Hall. Brick construction from the 1930s. Situated in Pipervika in central down town Oslo. After my studies in England, I can tell you, that in Manchester, a city carved out of brick, people eat brick for breakfast. I was surrounded by brick (and books), instead of Tomek, who was studying in Amsterdam at the time.

We made up for those times, in Oslo, in front of bricky City Hall. Tomek said, I am as light as a feather, when his face turned red.

Oslo City Hall City Hall Oslo




The Historisk Museum at Frederiks gate 2. Said to be one of Norway’s most beautiful Art Nouveau buildings. Strongly influenced by Viking character. Featuring a Viking collection of weapons and tools.

Historisk Museum Oslo Historisk Museum Oslo


For macabre Viking sights, go for reconstructed Viking burial ships, that were made for rich (wealth is genetic in Norway) Vikings, to give them the last ride to the realm of the dead. The Viking Ship Museum is located at Bygdøy. Alternatively, watch how many tourists fit in a Viking boat, before it sinks, at Oslo’s fjord.

Viking ship Oslo port




Oslo has got some nice old decorative buildings, but you got to hunt them down. Like these on Akersgata. Look at that hilarious fake-neglected entrance gate of high class fashion boutique ‘Moods of Norway’.

nice old building Louis Vuitton Oslo nice old building with trendy boutique Oslo


If you need to make a call or text message, go here. The old main post office on Dronningens gate 15, has got pretty façade.

Old building Telegraf Telefon Oslo




I would like to specifically point out this sight. The pointing finger fountain at Christiania Torv square. This place is where Danish king Christian IV made a historical decision. After the catastrophic fire in 1624, he pointed to this spot and said: “We will build a new town here!” Noble, deserves a fine fountain.

How about this: at the same time, that he decided to rebuild, he decided to rename. Oslo was named ‘Christiana’, which sounds only a bit like his name. Three hundred year later, in 1925, Norway, demonstrating increased national awareness, renamed it back again.

Pointing finger fountain Oslo


Retro dandelion fountain. This fountain made me think of horrible lamps. Yep, I have witnessed design horrors in the 80s.

Dandelion fountain Oslo




Come loaded. Stuff is generally expensive and overpriced. My analytical mind has done some market research on the topic. For example, take my H&M sweater, for which I paid 249 Kronen, which is 34 Euros. It is on sale for 25 Euros, right here at H&M Budapest, featuring the exact same collection. Don’t frown, if you call yourself ‘independent traveller’ looking for ‘the real thing’. That was a cool sweater I real-ly needed, for the un-real weather conditions, that is (called) summer in Norway.

For high street shops, like ZARA, H&M, Mango and some of Oslo’s biggest shopping centres – walk the main street of Karl Johans gate.

For exclusive shops, like Hugo Boss, Lois Vuitton, Moods of Norway – you have already seen the last two here – try Akersgata.

And you remember the pics from Aker Brygge – great for strolling, shopping and eating.




Does excessively spoil carnivores. Norwegians mainly serve calorie monsters and love fast food. Here are the culinary secrets of Norway.

If you do not share Viking eating preferences, I recommend this sushi place. Been there twice. All their Sushi rolls look exactly the same. They are not Japanese and serve Asian dishes as well. If I had not been to Japan, I would probably rate the sushi as ‘very good’. Hygiene is European standard. Lipstick on glasses.

We were happy to find a nice alternative to the dominating kebab, burgers and pizza places. Lille Sumo, Olav V’s gate 4, it’s in Oslo Sentrum.

Sushi restaurant Oslo Sushi restaurant Oslo




If you are into movies visit one of Oslo’s theatres with cool computerised ticket counters. If you are deeply into movies (and passionately into making out), visit the Oslo Filmens Hus and watch a classic. I would recommend this animated piece of fun, called ‘How to train your dragon‘. It is about a young Viking who makes friends with a dragon, instead of traditionally killing it like real Vikings are supposed to do, eventually changing Viking macho attitudes.

Computerised ticket counter movie theatre Oslo




I have prove that there are buses and trams and I have found this website, that will tell you all you need to know:

Public transport Oslo,


We had the privilege of driving an over-dimensional gangsta car, from the Arschloch community. The car ate the NOK equivalent of another H&M sweater, at the car park. Enough said on Oslo’s parking fees.

parking in Oslo


There are city bikes everywhere in the city, that you can rent. Optionally, walk up to graffiti art.

City bikes for rent Oslo graffiti art Oslo




If you are considering to do major sight seeing, then get the Oslo Pass to save big bucks on transport and entrance fees. Admission to over 30 museums and attractions is free with the Pass. It will also give you free rides on all public transport within zone 2.

This site has all the tourist infos on the Oslo Pass, transport, sights, …, …, …



Phew. That took ages to write, I need a break. See you later!

Good-bye kiss sculpture.

face sculpture Oslo

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