Cool’n crazy sights in Norway Nr 6. Cats Knotts Nature
I am a fan of nature.
Wait, Tomek just overlooked my starting sentence and is smiling brightly. Great, he’s showing an intensified reaction. He is frowning and laughing at the same time. Love of my life.
All right. Maybe I should start over. Norway is for nature lovers, which I am, UNLESS I am given the tempting choice to do city sights. Nature and city life unfortunately don’t mingle too well.
However, when I do get the chance to come across nature, I love it. Like in Norway, where nature is stunning… where I truthfully enjoyed undisturbed countryside. I happily took paths up a hill, down a rock, across a fjord, near a waterfall. Moss and rock is BEAUTIFUL. The fact, that I got new trainers in pink for the hike, has little to do with it. I think.
You don’t believe me. I was prepared for that. Here is proof. Amazing pictures from Preikestolen and the county of Sogn og Fjordane:
Norwegian paradise beach in lake form.
Work of elves.
Swamps, despite being hideous murderers, are beautiful.
I am hugging troll.
Remember troll mythology, when rocking Norway.
Welcome to troll spa ‘Thunderous Showers’.
Wow-waterfalls between Grøndalsvatnet lake and Støytsvatnet lake.
Go with the flow.
Some waterfalls come with drinking wells.
Lakelets and woodland are pixie playgrounds.
Enter the capital of pixie land.
This is when humans take over pixie land.
I experienced what it is like to walk into an office calender with panorama landscapes.
I took part in strenuous mountain group expeditions.
I watched trolls play.
I saw weird moss trees and strange troll behaviour.
The thing I love most about nature is this.
Did you notice, how I am assimilating with the native Norwegian? I exchanged my city look for a functional Norwegian outdoor outfit. I have sneakers on my feet! Last time I wore sneakers, I was a teenager in a gym but my colour choice was less flashy. In Norway money started to matter, which meant that there was little room for fastidiousness in the shoe department, which in the end meant silver or pink sneaks. I think I chose wisely. Now I know that 350 NOK for cross-trainers is a bargain, because yesterday we paid the exact equivalent for our five hour parking ticket in Oslo.
My new Norwegian style raincoat. A present of wind-proof mercy from our rich Norwegian friends.
Norway is not only known for its opulent landscapes and superb outdoor gear. No. Everyone knows about the legendary MISSING CATS. Every town, every village, every street in Norway has got its missing cat. And I am talking DOG. Norwegian cats make Garfield look like an microscopic kitty. Norwegian cats come dog-sized with the tail of a grown fox. That’s what I am talking about:
They come up close and do all the tricks, to get the most out of your fridge.
Look out for missing cats or play ‘who has counted the most missing notes’. It’s also brain gymnastics – by all means, do not collect those missing-notes!
Now on to the Norwegian ANIMAL that SUCKS the most, literally. It sucks blood and is not a mosquito. Nor a vampire, nor zombie. It’s a KNOTT. A mini fly that lives on our most precious body fluid. I have been living on this planet for over thirty HAPPY years, because of my oblivion to those blood suckers. Now that I have encountered them, my view of the world has changed. Flies are by no means harmless. They feed on us. Knotts make your arms and legs itch so bad, you will demand immediate amputation. Mosquitoes are not the worst enemies. That’s shocking.
Knotts come in swarms. They are also called ‘black flie’s or masters of stealth. They are tiny and blood thirsty. Just after sundown they will ruin your day, when crossing their habitat, which is everywhere: grassland, bushes, hills and riverbanks.
Knotts laugh at mosquito repellent and you need this to keep them away:
For every problem, there is a solution. No. See? Um.
Now let’s see, what am I going to wear tomorrow. Oh, we are not yet finished with the knott? I did find pictures. But I am not going to show you Tomek’s calves. It has been a week since the knott attack. Just think big crusts and scars. Knotts’ bites swell up massively and take days to heal because, instead of having a clean cut case of syringe affair like mosquitoes, the black flies chew their way through skin, leaving a raw spot, when they are done.
Don’t be fooled by their miniature bodies. Could it be? Maybe it’s NOT THE KNOTT? Yes it is! Do NOT underestimate the KNOTT!
Have a nice day.
Nature is HORRIBLE. Hey, you know what I love about nature?